Scott Adams’s contribution to the Sunday comics on July 24, 1994 was a Dilbert comic involving an attempt by Dogbert to rally the cubicle workers against the pointy-haired boss by uniting them under his dubious authority. The comic begins with his rousing call to action…a call that is met with whining and hand-wringing. “You’re confusing us with people who have spines,” Wally explains when Dogbert is unable to induce his would-be disciples to stand up for themselves. “Don’t worry,” Dogbert reassures him. “I brought strap-on porta-spines for everybody.” Once everyone has strapped on a spine, and Dogbert broaches the subject of union dues, Dilbert agreeably assents. “That seems fair.” The trap is laid.
As the comic suggests, there is no substitute for a spine. The one you have has a big job and should be treated with the utmost respect and care, not supplanted by a plastic Halloween decoration fastened to your back from the outside. While damage to the spine in general is by no means untreatable, it is almost invariably very painful and may not be entirely reversible and should, therefore, be avoided.
Sometimes, though, accidents occur through no fault of your own. A badly maintained store or school, an unreasonably dangerous work environment, or even slip and fall hazards in the streets, themselves can lead even a moderately attentive person to take a spill and injure themselves seriously. In this event, the victim may begin to worry about how to pay their medical bills (and other bills, if they require time off work) and even consider turning to Dogbert for solace.
The fortunate truth is that bespectacled lapdogs are not your only recourse. Alternately, a spinal cord injury attorney exists who can ensure you the best possible compensation for your negligence-induced pain. Such an attorney can be found by contacting Christensen & Hymas, either at one of their offices or via phone call. If you, like Dilbert and his coworkers, find yourself wringing your hands at the prospect of taking on your own pointy-haired boss, don’t cave in—call (801) 506-0800 for a free consultation.